Johnathan K

He was really a nice guy. And smart too. I feel the need to tell you this because of the admission I am about to make.

My best friend Stephanie thought it would be very funny if she asked Johnathan to be my boyfriend. She told him I liked him a LOT. The problem with this was that I did not like him. At least not like that. I didn't like LIKE him, ya know?

He sat in front of me in Algebra 1/2. (Yes, we had a class called Algebra 1/2) He was pretty smart and not unattractive, albeit kinda nerdy. He had potential. Some guys do need to pluck their eyebrows. But 8th grade is not the time to start that.

Steph filled his head full of lies without even telling me. Imagine my horror and surprise when he passed me this note.



I don't think I can count him as one who broke up with me since I didn't know we were together, right? RIGHT?

Rockin Banner

I was about 5'5 or 5'6 in the 8th grade. Joel was probably 5'2'. I say this, not to poke fun at him, but just to press upon you the real charm this kid possessed back then. He wrote several notes, but it was always the creative little banners and drawings that I liked best.

The Dog Police

In my hometown, the local radio station would allow one lucky caller each weeknight to sick the "Dog Police" on someone who had wronged them. Essentially this meant that the DJ let you say the name of who you were upset with live on the air and then they played this catchy little jingle with dogs barking.
One week I was the lucky caller and I sicked the dog police jingle on John, a new guy at my school who had wronged my friend, Stacey. (Or so she said)

Immediately after the jingle played John called me at home.
Me: Hello?
John: Is this Penny?
Me: Yes
John: This is John ____.
Me: (silence)
John: Why did you do that?
Me: (In terrified defense) Because of what you did to Stacey.
John: You don't even know me.
Me: more silence
John hangs up

To this day, I can still hear him say that last sentence. "You don't even know me." The guy had a good argument there.

A week later John was my boyfriend. I never so much as held his hand, but he asked the magical question and I said yes. On Valentines Day I gave him a relatively expensive ID bracelet with his name engraved on it. He gave me a relatively expensive (possibly stolen) gold heart locket. Immediately therafter this note was handed to me by his friend, Beto.

For several years John held the title of being The Only Person Who Ever Broke Up With Me.

Would Give Up Anything

That's quite a commitment coming from a 13 year old.
I believe this is the last time he asked. His declaration of his willingness to sacrifice "anything" for me, might have won me over. But honestly, I don't remember.

Still Likes Angie but....

Keeping with our tradition, Scott only wrote me notes asking me to "go with" or be his girlfriend. If these notes were dated, you would see our on/off affair lasted an excuitiating month, probably. It seems I kept breaking it off and he kept trying to make it work.

If my friend Angie were available now, do you think Scott would still be interested? I'm guessing yes.